Talking about the shoes I'm thinking about wearing to her birthday party:
L,:ah those ones!
you will not be able to walk or dance for very long
but they are hot
me: yeah the walk from work to the office is treacherous
but i stand tall
and they accentuate my calves
L.: thats what heels are for
me: i could also stab someone in the eyes with them if necessary
L.: elongating and sculpting
and self defense
me: heh the trifecta all shoes should aspire to
And then when L. expresses some frustration with her day at the office:
me: i have listened to the latest britney spears album on repeat all day
you should try it
l.: what the hell is your problem are you losing it?